Saturday, December 20, 2008


04/100 and 03/100 was my score in the first, second terminal examination(ripleys believe it or not!). Mesmerized? as a child who is seeing the magic but for the first time? yes this was my score in mathematics when I was in eighth standard (irony (breaking news): today I am an IT Engineer). Even Aryabhatta would have repented why he invented zero seeing the score of his indigenous student to be equivalent to it. Mathsophobia...more than seventy percent of greenhorn toddlers in India gets intimidated by the numeral system and being my inclination towards true patriot I was not left behind in-fact belonging to crème-de-la-crème of the seventy percent.

My aversion towards MAD-HE MAD-ICS began as an amateur when I was besieged to learn the multiplication tables and division juxtaposed to my woes. I contemplated, had there been only addition and subtraction, my stack of score could have been overflowed. My memory processing unit used to melt down whenever instruction like ÷,×,≥,≤,<,> came for opcode fetch. The memory read and memory write operations used to play game of swapping amongst in the neuron (yeah I really enjoyed learning 8085 microprocessor this semester :-)…. The huge Sridhar Acharaya formula still haunts me. How can any Indian with such spiritual name do this to another Indian?
At the eleventh hour of my exams I used to implore and adulate cohort for some illegal help.
My weary soul was searching for a lighthouse and I was like a floating ship without rudders.OMG! How I wish Taare Zameen Par was released at that time, I would have considered myself as “Lord’s Special child” .

I was deluded by people saying maths is as docile as a lamb. An inner racket woke my dormant mad-he-mad-ics talent. As vying got tougher (gratitude to my big ego…) it kindled my inner fire that was lurking for years. Consolidating my fragmented aplomb, I began to plan my maths innings. My first endeavor was to mug up the problems and guess what I was lucky enough… (Defacto : “something is better than doing nothing”) following the trend of Bengali egalitarian of mugging up everything. My sheer diligence fostered my score to move northward and abhorrence towards maths to move southward. My confidence grew more robust, mates independent and secure (java is too high on my priority list…)
As my adeptness pampered, the door of comprehending the problems got ajar and rest is history.

“Feed the faith fear will starve to death”

P S: Grammatical errors are intuitive to me and Chetan Bhagat..:-)

Thursday, December 18, 2008

USA...The Root of Terrorism

As you sow so shall you reap…This adage became the de facto for the US of A when they were annihilated by the(shoes..sorry Bush but as the adage goes..:-) metallic kites in the worst terrorist attack ever on 9/11.The Presidential elect Barrack Obama is on record high advocating the escalation of military in Afghanistan. But history has something subtle to say . In the late 70’s the military of Afghanistan invited the People’s Democratic Party(PDP) to form a coalition government with the Marxist under the leadership of Noor Mohammed Taraki, a poet and novelist. Under his regime Afghanistan began to prosper as never before and Kabul became a cosmopolitan city. Girls education became compulsory, legalization of labor unions, women held top post in the government . People looked this as kaleidoscope of hopes. But the elitists poked their long nose because of the egalitarian and economic policies of the Taraki governance.

Almost immediately after the PDP coalition came to power, the CIA(Central Intelligence Agency of US), assisted by Saudi and Pakistani military(ISI), launched a large scale intervention into Afghanistan on the side of the ousted feudal lords, reactionary tribal chieftains, mullahs, and opium traffickers. The then Carter administration was providing huge sums to Muslim extremists to subvert the reformist government. Part of that effort involved brutal attacks by the CIA-backed mujahideen (Islamic guerrilla fighters) against schools and teachers in rural areas.. In 1979 Taraki was executed.

The seriously besieged PDP government asked soviet union to send a contingent of troops to help ward off the mujahideen and foreign mercenaries, all recruited, financed, and well-armed by the CIA. The CIA recruited almost 1 million radical Muslims from forty countries including Pakistan, Algeria, Iran and termed as holy war i.e the notorious Jihad. Ruling the country gangster-style and looking for lucrative sources of income, the tribes ordered farmers to plant opium poppy. The Pakistani ISI, a close junior partner to the CIA, set up hundreds of heroin laboratories across Afghanistan.

By 1995 an extremist strain of Sunni Islam called the Taliban---heavily funded and advised by the ISI and the CIA and with the support of Islamic political parties in Pakistan---fought its way to power, taking over most of the country, luring many tribal chiefs into its fold with threats and bribes. Suspected murderers and spies were executed monthly in the sports stadium, and those accused of thievery had the offending hand sliced off. The Taliban condemned forms of “immorality” that included premarital sex, adultery, and homosexuality. They also outlawed all music, theater, libraries, literature, secular education, and much scientific research. All men were required to wear untrimmed beards and women had to wear the burqa which covered them from head to toe, including their faces.

Upon taking over Afghanistan, the mujahideen fell to fighting among themselves. Several fled to home and others went to Pakistan and India to foster terror in the name of holy war and this way it spread to whole world. The US was paid back in its own coin. And now in the face of all this Obama’s call for “change” rings hollow.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Its all about Money

Do you think you know a lot about money? Maybe you do. Maybe you don't. But let's see if any of the following facts are in any way surprising to you:

1. More of our fantasies are about money... than sex.

2. If we could have any luxury in the world (and money didn't matter) more of us would choose to spend money on a butler and a maid than anything else.

3. 90% of Americans who own pets buy them Christmas gifts.

4. Money is the leading cause of disagreements in marriages.

5. 65% of Americans would live on a deserted island all by themselves for an entire year for $1,000,000.

6. For $10,000,000 most of us would do almost ANYTHING! Including abandoning our family and friends and our church. A very high percentage of us would, for that same amount of money, change our race or sex. And, 1 in every 14, would even murder someone for ten million bucks.

What's really strange about this is, the statistics remain the same whether it's ten million dollars all the way down to three million. For three million bucks, most of us would do the same horrible things we would do for ten million. But, guess what? Few of us would do these things for a "measly" two million.

7. 92% of us would rather be rich than find the love of our lives.

8. Here's a weighty one: Money (or the lack thereof) is the biggest stress inducer in the lives of Americans. We worry more about money than our marriages, our health, or even who's going to win the Superbowl Game or come out on top in the latest Survivor TV show.

9. If you get your money out of a Hitachi ATM machine in Japan, it will be laundered. The way they do it is, they briefly press the bills between rollers at high enough temperatures to kill most bacteria.

10. Women have very fixed ideas on how much they are willing to spend on a bra. 38.3% of women won't spend $30 for a bra. 28.4% won't spend $50. 10% would pay as much as $75. And, only 3.5% would shell out $100. But, you know what? Almost 20% of women say they would pay almost anything for a bra. This is because they consider (and I guess so do a few men) that the contents of what those bras are encasing is of extremely high-value.

11. Nearly half of the people who sell their houses with furniture included will take all the light bulbs out of all the lamps when they vacate the premises.

12. Most people won't bend over to pick up money lying on the sidewalk unless it's at least a dollar.

13. Most Americans think pennies are a pain in the ass and the U.S. Mint should stop making them.

14. There is about 405 billion dollars in circulation. Only 32 million of that amount is counterfeit. That means, the percentage of counterfeit money in America is .0079%. And, $20 bills are more often counterfeited than $100 bills.

15. Do people care if their bills are crisp? Indeed, they do. Fresh, crisp, clean bills are considered much more valuable than those which are old, wrinkled and dirty.

I once sent a 'dollar bill thank you' letter to a guy who sent a sincere letter back to me [no swearing please]ing the free $1 bill I sent him was wrinkled instead of crisp as I had described in the letter.

16. Let's flip a coin and try to guess whether it will come up heads or tails. Three times as many people guess 'heads' than 'tails'.

17. Here's one I personally think really [naughty word removed]s: One out of every four Americans believe their best chance of getting rich is by playing the lottery.

18. How about this one for a shocking fact: 5% of lottery ticket buyers buy 51% of all tickets sold. (Trust me, none of these people belong to the "Einsteins of America Society".)

19. A staggering 74% of us are influenced by how much we can win in a lottery as opposed to the odds of us winning.

20. That's a good thing for the Government because the odds of winning a lottery jackpot are about 10 million to 1.

21. A person who drives 10 miles to buy a lottery ticket is 3 times more likely to be killed in a car accident while driving to buy the ticket... than... he is to win the jackpot.

22. Sunday newspaper coupon inserts are the second-most read section of the paper, after the front page.

23. Few people know it but, you can buy single-disease insurance.

24. Only 6% of people in America regularly buy clothes tailor made just for them.

25. Here's one that's really important: 63% of us decide NOT to buy a product advertised on the Internet... because... we think the shipping and handling charges add too much to the order.

26. Eight times as many Americans would rather use an ATM than deal with a real live teller.

27. This one's going to blow your mind: 83% of Americans still pay with checks instead of credit cards!

28. Almost 30% of us say we would need 3 million smackaroos to feel rich. This ties in with the fact most of us would do anything for as little as $3 million... but... not nearly as many of us would do those identical things for a measly $2 million. (Hey, here's your chance to take advantage of that situation. If you only want to pay $2 million to have something done, ask me if I'll do it. The chances are, believe it or not, I WILL DO IT.)

29. Here's another fact which is really, really important: 80% of Americans say giving personal information (especially their credit card information) over the Internet scares the living [no swearing please] out of them.

30. Two-thirds of Americans say they wouldn't let their spouse spend the night and have sex with another person for a million dollars. Many of these people are liars. There's a big difference being asked if they would do it for a million dollars... as opposed to... handing them a paper sack containing the million fungolas and simply saying, "Here, you can have this if you'll let me sleep with your sweetie tonight."

31. The average wedding in America costs a staggering $20,000.00.

32. More than one-third of American women consider money more important than good sex to the success of a marriage.

33. According to Employee Benefits Research Institute 96% of all people who have jobs right now won't be eligible for their full Social Security benefits when they reach age 65.

34. When it comes to houses, more than anything else, people want a state-of-the-art kitchen.

35. When people shop for a car, what they want more than anything else is reliability for the best possible price.

36. One of the best ways to raise money for a charity is to have a free dinner for a lot of people and have an empty envelope tucked under their plate... for the express purpose... of making whatever size donation they want.

37. People tip more on sunny days than they do on dreary days.

38. More than 80,000,000 people call the I.R.S. Information Hotline phone number every year. One-third of those calls go unanswered. And, according to the Treasury Department itself, 47% of the answers the 'get-through' callers receive are incorrect.

39. Almost two out of three people have modified their financial behavior because of their fears.

40. Almost three times as many people who live in the South worry about losing their jobs as compared to people who live in the Midwest.

41. Which would you rather do: Shop till you drop... or... have great sex?

For men, this is a no-brainer.

However, more women would actually rather have an unlimited shopping spree than spend a weekend with a fabulous lover. In fact, the #1 favorite fantasy of women is to have a blank check to shop at their favorite store.

The favorite fantasy of men (at least in my opinion) is what we would like to DO to the sales girl... rather than... what we would like to buy from her

Thursday, October 2, 2008


God threw me in the gifts of Nature's Intelligence and i soaked it like a sponge.A young firm stellar rainmaker in waiting oozing like a gushing mountain stream after rain......that's me Ankit
I am not selfish but i want everything:-)

Saturday, August 23, 2008

The Corporate Language

"We will do it"
" You will do it"

"You have done a great job"
"More work to be given to you"

"We are working on it"
"We have not yet started working on the same"

"Tomorrow first thing in the morning"
"Its not getting done...
At least not tomorrow !".

"After discussion we will decide - I am very open to views"
"I have already decided, I will tell you what to do"

"There was a slight miscommunication"
"We had actually lied"

"Lets call a meeting and discuss"
"I have no time now, will talk later"

"We can always do it"
"We actually cannot do the same on time"

"We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline"
"The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time."

"We had slight differences of opinion"
"We had actually fought"

"Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you"
"Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"

"You should have told me earlier"
"Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!"

"We need to find out the real reason"
"Well I will tell you where your fault is"

"Well... family is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected"
"Well you know..."

"We are a team"
"I am not the only one to be blamed"

"That's actually a good question"
"I do not know anything about it"

"All the Best"
" You are in trouble"

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Aspiration v/s unreasonable demands...

“She smiled at you because she thinks you are her father’s best friend”……I pouted to my mate when he tried to hit at my gf. I’m addicted to mock at people and life seems to reciprocate it. My psychometric test result seems in ambivalent state...........

You have a desire to do your best and to explore your full potential. This gives you a sense of satisfaction and personal fulfillment. However, it is important to learn how to distinguish between aspirations and unreasonable demands. With unreasonable demands you are being cruel to yourself and denying yourself the rewards and self-acceptance that you deserve.

Accomplishment and doing things well can feel good, as long as you don't make happiness and fulfillment contingent upon them”.

This is as true as Lord’s existence. I love people whose haunches are at acme, always try to learn and imitate them. I want more and more from life. The main question that itches my heart, kidney, liver is what is the fulfillment, how much I want to achieve, what is my satisfaction? I want to conquer the whole world? Were I a Hitler or something like that before my renaissance. When I go to my museum and turn pages of my past ……myriads of attributes has been juxtaposed beside my name but still my greedy heart wants more (Yeh dil maage more!).

I expect a lot from myself. I want everything that has its physical existence in this cruel globe. Am I suffering from paranoia? My unreasonable demands never make my eye have a deep slumber. Polar to this I am getting ruffer & tuffer day by day. I have become robust and adept. I always try to face the predicament with audacity thinking these are very tiny more are yet to come.

But one sentence that halts my modus operandi ……

Will I fall apart? I neither want to be ice nor any celestial body….

Monday, July 14, 2008

Once in a Blue Moon...

I was so blasé with my lappy dinging the same jaded bollywood beats that I slapped the headphone and pigeonholed it. Seldom I become boorish but when my aplomb berserks, it gets into sort of morbid state. A night of july was one such experience when solitude enveloped me into its aura. It felt like a proletarian caught in bourgeoisie net. When these types of thoughts beckon us “hapless” is the word we reckon. I just disinterred my temple and had a automatic (google) search to the museum of my past. A song reciprocated all my lost accord. Encore! I still remember, I still remember ha , incredible my school anthem …….

(Please sing in rhyme)

We the student of Aloysius,
Come together as one family,
Give us all your wisdom,
To spread the light all around.

You love poor children,
Brought joy in their hearts,
Love and kindness bestowed on them,
Shed tears for the eternal rewards.

We the student of Aloysius,
Come together as one family,
Give us all your wisdom,
To spread the light all around.(3)

Thursday, June 26, 2008

OOL..Owl or Lark

Folks baptized me “ullu ka patha”(owls sycophant). At that time I just used to grumble at them but just few days back I came to know that owl is the “Bird Of Wisdom” All my 20 years of experience in the globe I thought it to be “Bird Of Night” , common sense isn’t it?

The audacious owl who surveys the world spreading the light of wisdom and strikingly polar is the melodious Lark, “the Bird of Songs” who wakes catching the first light of the biggest Star. The owl urges the people to gather knowledge and wisdom while the lark urges the people to arouse early, spread blithe and be carefree.
People often associate homo sapiens with the attributes similar to the animals. People who work better at night are considered Owls and people who work better in the early sunlight are considered as Larks. The owls prefer solitude while the larks are gregarious.
People who do better during moonshine generally live their life in problems and are usually busy finding solutions as they are intelligent .Dawn people are very blissful, carefree and live their life in present as they believe “Life is all about living in the moment”(Hrithik’s favorite liner).
I might be incorrect in judging the owls and larks but I reckon as there are two flip of a coin (polar) so there are two kind people ……….owl and lark.

I belong to the owls ………where do you belong??

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Thomas Days..

Caesar’s destiny was linked with conspiracy but mine had something else in store. I was pretty much obsessive to get into commerce but a thought (AB ad- an idea can change your life…..its true its explicitly true in my case) provoked which made me cross the Rubicon and took science at the eleventh hour of my application letter to principal Mirza.
My school life can be depicted in two phases the Aloysius phase and Thomas phase. The first phase was very much conducive in my intellectual pursuits and the coming elevated my spiritual experience, enriched my mind, cultivated my body, nourished my soul (mind and body heart and soul tujme shakti hai anmol……… love you Shankar, Ehsaan ).I ventured the cocoon of ordinary and began to explore the realm of extraordinary.

I was very anxious….. as an adolescent who is ready for his fresh face first shave about marching into science stream. My first year evanesced analyzing the teachers. Here are some..

Bhadhuri!!!!! can I ever forget this globe shaped phantom, a Schadenfreude, man in black , with black hair incandescent from 3 table spoon of coconut oil , used to oil his moustache too, his bum bigger than the chair. He was the physics teacher, always came with chalks in his hand like an array of bullets completing two to three chapters in probably 35 minutes (chapters even which were not interrelated to each other like rotational motion, optics, semi conductors) .

Monica De!!!!! anyone in our batch will ever forget her……her statement “let the air open and let the window come”. Caution :-That remark is copyright protected so never try to use. Her lectures were so soporific that even a horse would creep.

Rupreka……oh sorry Ruprekha..huh Rooprekha..err the rajdhani express, chemistry teacher she was so fast that sometimes skipped her own notes which she always brought with her to ctrl+c and ctrl +v in the board. She seldom smiled and when she did (sardonically) it was contravening her “12 pound mass between her shoulders” (cynic people I am referring to her face).whenever I heard the word chemistry all my God gifted soaked natures intelligence came to my toes…...i never understood the difference between flask and a beaker while both are meant for keeping solutions :(

Mr.Pandey..a superannuated, jaded,effete creature resembling a toothpick..any thomasite worth his salt please do the honours for him.

I gave a center shock to all (even to me) by coming 9th in class (although it was not my lone effort, classroom was too small and the invigilators were indulgent yet it was a good debut). Here I met the “green mango more” (translate it to hindi and keep to yourself) of our class , Rajwant Singh Chauhan (certainly a stellar in coming years, amazing personality and his name says it all, mind you not Vijay Dinanath..).My soul was mesmerized by his idiosyncrasy , personality, flirting nature, his everest ( 8848m yes still I remember it) like aplomb, his powerful communication, his zen like focus (I m not talking about Tiwari’s car)and his King-kong style of ramp walking at farewell day. With his reference I came in contact with fidel achates(I can keep on adding myriad attributes for days) Ankit Chowdhary aka Karan (and me Arjun as called by VJ bhaiya).Actually we are birds of same feather who always flocks together. In his closure I comprehended the authentic meaning of friendship and today we share an unassailable bond (thank god nobody calls us Jai–Veeru, that’s sounds too tacky).

Thomas days will be incomplete without mentioning the 3 symonds (crap man..I have to revise my Hanuman chalisa ) of the class, Hritwik, Pankaj and Saurav. They were called the 3 triumvirate with little territory to show. If by chance they attended any classes then snowing in Siberia was inevitable. They were the peons of class oops the prefects, use to loiter like an empty kicked cans of cokes. They were often found in junior class(11) which was called the fairyland because the likes of Sonams, Rachnas, Mamtas (their muma bathed gazillion times in milk before giving them birth) dwelt there. Your dark grey cells will reckon I know these because they were my mates ..sorry I was the fourth australian.
I know I refered myself an Australian but they are also human being oops sorry living being (i am going to ramsethu to commit..) Its time to rest my fingers..will come back soon (mind you I m not gangulified :)

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Time and Tide never waits...

When I was a child, I use to often hear my dad saying "Waqt se bada koi dost nahi hota aur waqt se bada koi dushman nahi" (Time is the best pal as well as best enemy).At that age I was very much ignorant.But today I can realize how it can create an impact on the common man.People often says I don't have time.It's just like saying you don't have time to stop for fuel because you are too busy driving.<

To understand the value of a year ask a student who failed in his exam
To understand the value of a month ask a woman who gave a premature birth
To understand the value of a week ask a editor of a weekly magazine
To understand the value of an hour ask a man who is waiting for his girlfriend
To understand the value of a minute ask a man who missed his flight
To understand the value of a second ask a man who just survived a hit and run
To understand the value of a millisec ask a silver medalist at Olympics

You must have heard the story of the Tortoise and the Hare.In that the Hare stops and sleeps just before the finishing line and consequently Tortoise wins the race. Slow and Steady wins the race.This is the moral of the story whic we are learning since our huggies days.But let me tell you that this story is incomplete..yes incomplete.After that race the hare challenged the Tortoise once again and this time he didn't sleep and won. So the moral of the combined story is Slow and Steady 'Completes' the race but Fast and Consistent wins the race.In first story the Tortoise completes the race but in 2nd the Hare wins it.

People often thinks Life is a mere candle but for me Life is not a brief candle it is like a splendid torch which i have to hold for a moment and burnt it as brightly as possible before passing it to future generation.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Yaadein..Yaad aati hain !

Both lived in the same building , played several game amongst long time back. The bull dog ignorant when she grew and his love too. He would spend hours waiting in the stairs for the bull frog to open the door till the milkman arrived exactly at 7:45 in dark. Both eyes met, he turned red, she turned pink ,millions of words exchanged in that silent glare. In that one second they lived their live in utopia. The bull dog had a caller tune

“O the bull dog on the bank
And the bull frog in the pool
The bull dog saw the bull frog
In green old water pool”

But the tra-lal-lal-la was missing!

”She is so Beautiful”, he pouted to his mate when she closed her door. He would always think of giving some bucks to the milkyman so that he can stare her long but always feared (at that time the Do The Dew ad was not so famous).Hysterically he would go straight back to his floor to see his face in the glass how he looked when she saw him and when his instinct(basic) said yes he would blissfully blush (he is male but still…). His eyes said it all. The bull dog slumber went for a run and he could only see elegance personified frog compared with bollywood queens. The bull dog‘s plethora of talent came to his toe when he thought of vibes with her….his temple went blank whenever she came close to him. He in his deep shell of shyness, she in her kaleidoscope of shyness..both numb.
Once he captured her in his moto phone, he was so ardent that he made oblivious blunder of not storing it.. He never before repented in his life as he was architect of future but for the first time.
Both naïve caught by the stupid cupid(Aaja re panchi khol guthiya-Jhoom Barabar Jhoom). A cupid day came, atlast he was adamant to call her. On the eve of that day she smiled at one of his PJ ,and he was ready to commit……… , yeah that signal was enough to call her. He called, she picked up..

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

The World's most weird cases

In September 2004, judge Ak Patabendige of Sri Lanka jailed a man for yawning in the court.

A Father from Beijing was refused legal permission to name his son “@” after the keyboard character. Permission was declined on legal basis that all names should capable of being translated into mandarin.

In 2007, a court in India was asked to decide whether a vibrating condom is contraceptive or a sex toy as sex toy is banned in India.

In 2005, a 31 year old Brazilian woman sued her husband for failing to give her orgasms.

In 2004, Timohy Dumouchei from Fond du Lac sued a tv channel for making his wife fat and transforming his children to “lazy channel surfers”. Around 1 lac American lawyers were occupied for a while later it was rejected.

In 1874,Francis Evans while acting as magistrate in Winnipeg, Canada try himself on a charge of drinking in public place. He convicted himself and fined himself with 5$.But later he stated……”Francis Evans taking into account past good behaviour ,your fine is remitted”

In 2005,a Russian astrologer sued NASA for £165 million for “disrupting the balance of the universe” .The Moscow court accepted the claim but later it was rejected.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Down in the dumps......

When I asked my cousin “which is our national sport”, the answer was pretty obvious to my conscience “Cricket” ……..
Hockey, once an Indian pride is now India’s ignominy. It has now become the national film or rather national slogan which is quiet famous “chak de india”.
The game is successful stuff in bollywood films but has little relevance in reality. There was once a time when Indian hockey was at its zenith with no one dare to compete .When Dhyanchand and his men used to raise their sticks all the Indians used to roar with them. They dominated the whole of globe ( chak de was not released then ). At that time hockey was considered as game more of skills of a stick and short passes. The rules were very much suited to the indigenous. The west realized that the 8th time Olympic gold medalist is invincible so rather changing their own game they changed the rules. The ban on raising the stick above waist height, playing on astro turfs dismantled the skills and focused more on fitness, stamina and long passes. Indian hockey entered into period of eclipse and today it is in the darkness.
These factors were anodized by the office bearers of the IHF. The chairperson as-a-(w)hole :) has done a tremendous job in deprecating the standards of Indian hockey. Under his regime 13 coaches were sacked or resigned. It is simplistic to blame one person for the debacle after 80 years.
After this debacle the souls of our heroes will mourn……..

O’mighty Indian hockey,
Dost thou lie so low.
All thy conquest, glories, triumphs, spoils,
Shrunk to this little measure…..fare thee well.

Saturday, February 23, 2008


When I was born people were rejoicing (ladka hua) and i was crying seeing the scissor which cut my umbilical cord(isn’t it ridiculous,I don’t remember but that’s common sense). My family pedigree always represented blue-blood but with my birth it turned red.

After completing two decade in this earth when I go back to my huggies days (although I never wore it) I wonder what a brat I was. Just as a car without wheels, temple without an idol, me without puchkas doesn’t make sense, the word SCREWED with reference to my childhood is also senseless. Kuttipissah, yes that’s the word which the Malayalese describe for the small little devil. I had been into all the professions that I knew those days whether it be an engineer(used to postmortem all the electronic gadgets, that’s why today I am so called engineer),doctor(used to mix several medicines), businessman(tearing my notebook for virtual money and then play dukan dukan),police inspector (standing infront of mirror wearing a cap and with a stick in hand ),judge(take a hammer and then order order),Tipu Sultan(the sword which I often used to buy from balloonwala ),sportsman or rather a cricketer(there was no tube left in my home which me and my big B never broke).Newton’s third law was deeply in love with me. To every action of mine there was opposite reaction by my mom.

As a mundane I was also admitted to school (St.Aloysius).You will reckon that was the most sulking day of my life but that is deprecated. When I saw Mrs Julie entering ,I was hypnotized like a small child seeing the magic for the first time uuf she was so gorgeous and sexy (see how naughty I was at the age of 6) that my temple gorged by her whimsical figure. I used to act as a naïve in her class. She used to call students ”oye hero” and when I was called by that name (oh I had always wished to be in utopia with her) my adrenaline gland used to double its secretion and I used to feed my senses. I am my favorite so whenever I was asked who is your favorite actor I always said the obvious. But she was available only for a year (dirty minds, now don’t think she was a……).
As time passed by we were all exalted and in second standard a new sentence struck me “School is our second home”. I don’t exactly remember who that teacher was but if I knew the F word then, the consequence would have been the obvious, Termination or rather Ostracized.

Then came the years of obscurity ,where I made myriad faux passes and again screwing up my life.I got detached from my studies not knowing the reason, probably a jinx to my school life our unbeloved physics teacher Mr.Douloi .The earthly creature to which he most resembled was a Black Bull. He used to howl like anything , the student spoofingly agreeing to whatever he teached (exactly opposite what was written in the books).He was the only reason, I reckon why i was “promoted on trial” in eight standard (I was never a dull student).In coming years he was demoted and never took our classes(several complains were lodged to the principal by us). He was replaced by likes of sir Nobert Paul(the most evoking person in my life although many disliked him), Gopal Mishra (I disliked him).Transformation from 5 subject red mark getter to 12th rank getter was never easy but I however managed it with my sheer diligence and conducive efforts of my friends (Soumen and Piyush,class toppers).

I know that this is the most boring blog you have ever read but friends I am not going to stop(I will not say picture abhi baki hai,you all are too smart to understand that. ). I will abide by what was planned for me by the Holy Lord…. to bore people.
Next blog will be of my Thomas days. So keep an eye. Till then Happy Boring!!!

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Sourav "Dada" Ganguly...

Being an Indian celebrity is always a challenge that nurtures 3 folds especially if you belong to the cricketing world.Whether you be Cricketer,Bolly Star,Politician all have special priority list in media (and if u seek attention of INDIA TV then only Yama can save u).Here is a live testimony who have seen the greatest ups and downs of his career,probably has gone through enormous media attention……he is none other than who is Known as “THE FATHER OF ALL COMEBACK” yes I am talking about the Prince of Kolkata Saurav Ganguly.After the spectacular debut century at Lords the media juxtaposed beside his name myriad attributes like “Dada”, ”The Maharaj”, ”Royal Bengal Tiger”.Life went smooth for him for coming 4 years.In 2000,after the greatest incident of Match Fixing Saurav was exalted as a protagonist .A vigilant by nature ,with sheer determination,inborn leadership quality he made a young team which won the epic test match at the Eden Gardens,the Natwest Final, reached the World Cup finals and many victories under his belt which gave him the title of India’s most successful captain.
Then came the Zimbabwe tour in 2005 when he was asked to step down by the calcutta’s favorite middle finger guru.The media went against him and he was ultimately pigeonholed.Actually that was a blessing in disguise for him.The then Pandits of cricket wrote him off and counsel him to retire,even his team-mates ignored him but the tiger is after all a tiger.He was certain that his comeback is inevitable.After one and half year of sheer diligence,he left no stone unturned and in 2007 there was The Rise Of Phoenix thanks to the new chief selector.
He was so ardent about his comeback that he even went against his one time Godfather Mr.Dalmia.His bull dog determination surmounted all the bridges behind him.Today he is worshipped and epitomized by millions of youths in India.
By judging we can say.. He showed us how to handle success,how to handle failure,how to handle criticism,how to fight back adversities.He proved that Faith when blended with passion and desire can elude impossibilities.Well for joke there is new word included in the dictionary Gangulified which means thrown out and then recalled . Kudos!! for such a chivalrous Fighter .