Thursday, April 15, 2010

250 secs with Mallika Sherawat - II

The relentless bombardment of dirty thoughts finally halted when Malikaye Hindustan exuded my name juxtaposed with the Edison’s invented word Hello (Contd...)

Me : Hello Mallika howz you

William Brother hollered something which I didn’t fathom as I was obsessed with her sensuous voice. Finally, he again regurgitated the same threesome lines and guess what, he would listen to our conversation.

Mallika : I am doing great. What about you and what do you do, Ankit ? (aha aha I am so in love with my name)

Me : I am pursuing Engineering.
Mallika : Oh wow, I am impressed!!!

After the aforementioned word I went blank probably because of the zeitgeist of guilt that Engineering being so over hyped profession that it can impress someone from bollywood.

Mallika : Which field you are in?
Me : Computers (I have always abhorred the word IT, so any novice who inquires, I retort Computer engg)

Mallika : that’s wonderful
Me : So when is your movie(Hisssss..) releasing.

Mallika : ah its on...near completion
Me : My hearty wishes for its success. It would be a great hit.

Mallika : So sweet of you…but you have to promise that you will go and watch
Me : ya definitely, I will take my entire bunch of blokes
Mallika : thanks Ankit …(aha aha I so love my name aha aha)

*Few seconds of silence*

Me : Hey Mallika do you know I am a Magician
Mallika : oh really what kind of magic ?

Me : I can show it on you now
Mallika : acha ?

The ugly brother interrupted again in his american style woahing 3-4 times…I surmise he was trying to say wait wait wait but the accent made it sound like woah woah woah (exactly the sound of an ugly mutt).Now he wanted to inquire about what kind of magic I am going to employ upon the damsel.

William : What kind of magic? What you gonna do? First tell me ?
Given my sponge soaked natures intelligence, I was not going to waste my magic on an ugly retard so I ignored him.

Me : Don’t worry it will not harm you, Mallika
Mallika : You know William is very caring so you know….(Yes I know he is one kind of obnoxious weed)

William : zeigbousta geitoraaa hshdfks (which I eventually didn’t fathom and ignored him again. Some people really don’t understand that they are unwanted!)

Me : yeah but don’t worry Mallika…how can it harm you when you are on phone
William : dsgfkas hkshfk kjagsfkjas

I surmise that common sense prevailed in the ambience of her gray cells but the interlocutor was still not convinced. Oh! how i wished to inject his brain with 1 ml of intelligence.Instead of convincing that dumb I went ahead and employed one of my favorite quote which has been fired to very few of my favorite girls

“ Mallika,Take eleven red roses and look into the mirror you will find it twelve “

There was a pause of few seconds.She was obfuscated as small baby would be in a topless dance bar. After the quote William brother’s mind became tranquil and started pondering what actually I was trying to do. After few seconds I cajoled her

.”...because you are no less than a Red Rose “

Then she beamed , blushed and we all burst into laughter and finally that idiot had a sigh of relief that she was still alive.

Mallika : that was awesome and indeed you are a magician..
Me : thank you

Mallika : okay Ankit its time to sleep (as it was night in LA), It was wonderful talking to you.

Me : It was all my pleasure….and all the best again for your movie
Mallika : thank you and East or West India is the Best…I miss India
Me : yeah we Indians are the best….saare jaaha se acha Hindustan hamara !! Bubbyee


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  2. Ankit, are you sure, your magic will do it with Mallika...may be with some other gal..watta say?

  3. of course yes yaar, but at you own risk (:

  4. Lucky Boy!
    I visited this blog after an year, thanks to a bookmark which was still alive.
    As always, Nice entertainer, Now following you on Twitter too.

  5. insane dude, LOling thru out...impressd

  6. By - Brad Pághanni.
    From - Brazilian / Rio de Janeiro.
    Lge - Portuguese.

    Olá amigo. Vi seu blog em uma comunidade do Orkut. Eu sou brasileiro, e tenho um blog! Espero que não se importe em me seguir ou comentar lá.

  7. Howdy, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just curious if you get a lot of spam comments? If so how do you stop it, any plugin or anything you can suggest? I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy so any assistance is very much appreciated.